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enkel hetgene achter het gelijkheidsteken laten staan 
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a guy comes home from work and finds a snail on his doorstep.. he had a shitty day so he picks up the snail and chucks it as hard as he can. 2 weeks later the doorbell rings. the man opens the door and the snail says "what the fuck was that all about?"Comment
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I had a dream I ate a marshmallow. When I woke up my pillow was gone.Comment
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what do you call cheese that isn't yours
-nacho cheeseComment
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a pedophile and a 10 yr old are walking through the woods, the 10 yr old says "it sure is dark and scary out here" the pedophile says "your tellin me, I gotta walk back alone."Comment
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what does a blonde and a turtle have in common?
When they are on their back they are fuckedComment
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How do you catch a polar bear?
First you dig a hole in the ice
Next you place peas around the hole
And when the bear comes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.Comment
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A drunk staggers into a Catholic Church, enters a confessional booth,sits down, but says nothing.
The Priest coughs a few times to get his attention but the drunk continues to sit there.
Finally, the Priest pounds three times on the wall.
The drunk mumbles, "ain't no use knockin, there's no paper on this side either!"Comment
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So a snail painted a huge S on his car and was speeding to work one day
and a French man said look at that EscargoComment
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Russian blonde: we went to space first
American blone: we wento the moon first, the matter in fact we will go to the sun first too
Russian blonde: but it is hot there, you will burn
American blonde: we will go at night, smarty!Comment
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Kid playing with his train in the kitchen: "ok you fucking passengers, get on the train .... ok fucking passengers get off the train now"
Mother: "OK, I had it with all the swearing, go to your room"
An hour later the mother feels bad and let the kid come back to his toy in the kitchen
Kid: ok you good passengers, get on the train .... ok you good passengers get off the train now... and if you wanna complain about the hour delay, talk to the bitch at the sink"Comment
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There was a plane going overseas. The pilot realized after they had taken off that the plane was carrying too much weight. If they didn't lighten the load they were going to crash.
So they dumped the freight.
The plane was still too heavy. Then they dumped the luggage. Still too heavy! So the pilot announced to the passengers what was going on, and asked for about 15 volunteers to jump off the plane with a parachute. The navy had been alerted, so they would have ships waiting for them below. And they would get a pass to fly free on this airline for the rest of their lives.
No one budged.
The pilot asked again, still no one moved.
So the pilot says: "OK, we're going to pick people to jump, but fairly.
We'll go by alphabet, race by race: Please All African Americans step to the front of the plane now!"
No one moved.
He then says: "All Blacks, step to the front, please."
No one still moved.
"All Coloreds step to the front, please."
Still no one moved.
At this point a little boy asked his father: "Dad, aren't we African American or Black or Colored?"
The father says: "No, son, today we're Niggers. And if someone doesn't hurry up and step up to the front, we're going to be Zulu!"Comment
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A man with no arms and no legs is laying on the beach. A woman walks by and says, "Aww, you poor thing. Have you ever been hugged?" to which the man replies, "no." The woman hugs him and walks off.
A little while later a second woman walks by and says, "Aww, you poor thing. Have you ever been kissed?" to which he again replies, "no." The woman kisses him and walks off.
After another while has passed, a third woman walk by and says, "Aww you poor thing, have you ever been fucked?" to which the man yet again replies, "no." The woman looks out at the ocean and says, "Well, you will be when the tide comes in!"Comment
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what did a chinese family named their retarded child?
Sum Ting WongComment
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What would Martin Luther King Jr. be like if he were white?
Alive.Comment
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How do you get a nun pregnant? You fuck her.Comment
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What's the difference between and Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drunk.Comment
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why is there no point in teaching a woman how to ski? there's no snow in the kitchenComment
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